Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Conversion of Convenience?

This really saddened me. Why would you convert to another religion for a convenience to get married? Conversion to Islam doesn’t mean they will embrace being a Muslim. It is two different things. Why Islam is usually used to make things easy for them?

That makes me thinking (gosh, I haven’t used my grey matters critically for some time now) – why would one resist a divorce if your partner is not keen to remain in a marriage with you? Perhaps, the material things the man used to provide?

Of course, there is a children factor that you want them to have parents living under the same roof but do you think you would want your children subjected to continuous fighting and vulgarities thrown by their parents? Is that fair to them?

Why would one stay in a marriage for the sake of one’s children? Perhaps, one thinks that the other half will change their mind and be back home soon that they could live happily ever after. Is it all about possession (coz I can say I hate losing my favourite things)? However, why do you want to hold one down in a marriage when there are no emotions involved? Isn’t that sad? That’s pathetic, I feel.

What most perplexed me, the men always say that they are not happy with their marriage yet they still manage to ‘produce’ 6 kids, with the youngest one being 2.5 years old, for instance? Doesn’t copulation involve certain degree of attraction to each other that you feel that you make this woman as the mother to your children? Wait! Do they think while copulating?

I am glad I managed to realise, just in time, that love between a man and a woman is not everything in this world. Life is full of complex webs of relationship. A marriage should be made in perfect unison to the rest of the relationships we have built for many years.

I am glad I realise that to get married, to attain true love, does not give me rights to wreck another family, in particularly to break another woman’s heart. A second chance to marriage, for some, does not mean you will make good for what is not good in your first marriage. Most of the time, you will end up being the same old person, making another woman suffers as much as the first one.

Like Muslims, Buddhists believe that there are reasons unknown to us why one married to a certain someone. Here is one story I wish to share – a man was contemplating to leave his wife for another woman. He prayed for a sign from up above if he is embarking on the right journey of his life. In a dream he had one night, stopped him from marrying again – in another life, he was in love with the second woman. One day, while walking with his love, a stranger tried to stab him but he was still alive. Why? The woman, who looks like his wife, plunged her body, covering him from being struck by the knife. So, he is married to his wife now because – he wanted to pay for the good deed his wife has made in his previous life.

Please, think again….
p.s. Bergen's take on second marriage is soooo hilariously true. Read his "The Guy in the Middle" here.

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