Saturday, May 9, 2009

Dear Ah-soo Hee and Mokcik Idah

Dear aunties,

thank you for crying wolf that both of you aunties had been manhandled by PKR and DAP state assemblymen last Thursday when you two were the ones 'sibuk2' amongst the gentlemen. I shall also do that when the guys in the LRT, commuter and bus came too near to me when those public transport were halted without notice. Yes, aunties, i will be laughing my way to the bank because i will make a lot of many money from such sexual modesty encroachment complaints i made. Yes, i will fill my wardrobe with stuffs from Zara and will then afford LV and Jimmy Choo (oh yes, 'belilah barangan buatan malaysia';).

Thank you aunties, you really are the voice of women in Malaysia who have enough of nonsense from men..kan?

Dear Ah-soo Hee,

I shall also get myself pepper spray so i could hurt those men where it hurts the most as i know i wont be able to kick them in their groin in such packed public transport. And aunty, i am a darn good cakemaker, will you teach me how to be a bloody good kingmaker? ;) Oh, before i forgot, i must salute you for making a remark that PAS men are the gentlemen lots. Indeed, they are, but how come you realised this now? This is internet-age world ma'am, please surf more ok?;) And google for Unit Amal PAS ok?

Dear Mokcik Idah,

I shall salute you getting out of your way to protect your lame men in that assembly hall. I've suggested too many a time that this nation has to be managed by women like Mokcik Idah. Er, Mokcik Idah, i believe you have overcame your fear for indians as you did not 'pukul' those indians when you and those lame men of yours appointed ..sapa tu (er, cannot get his name la since he lost in the last election Mokcik Idah) the new speaker. I'm so happy for you because you have saved this world from extinction of this one particular race, who has been scientifically proved as the most beautiful race. I guess when you have to save your(ass)self, you will overcome whatever 'phobia' you have, kan Mokcik Idah? ;)

Dear aunties,

I'm in a big dilemma. Mommies would not hurt people they care - that is your rakyat. Mommies would never make things worse as they are always the ones with good sense and highly capable of calming the maddening fire or hurricane. You see, perhaps with you as the good example of mommies, i shall stay away from getting that title. It is indeed a horrifying experience when you feel fatigue and suffer from body aches all over, just being around men...ish ish ish...kesian...Aunties, make sure you check yourselves in one of those boutique spas ok? Money isn't your problem after all...I know one in GE Mall in Jalan Ampang, want to go together-gether?;) Don't Kata Tak Nak ok?

Dear aunties,

Thank you from the deep of my heart. You both are truly the aunties that should have stayed at home and take good care of your children and husbands too? Congrats aunties - what a disgrace you two to all respectable women of Malaysia - dead and alive!



Oscar the Grouch said...

I can’t help thinking that both Ah-soo Hee & Makcik-makcik were correct in using the term “manhandled”, instead of “unintentional sensual assault”.

I guess one must be politically correct these days.

“Brutish manhandling” attracts a charge for assault & battery. “Unintentional sensual assault” qualifies as a sexual misdemeanour - of which their hope for a conviction are, perhaps, not so good.

Fi-sha said...

Dear Mssr Oscar

Thank you for 'enlightening' me on this. I know i need to learn more...

zewt said...

when i heard about their claims... i fell of my chair... this is indeed a land where everything boleh.

Fi-sha said...

Dear Zewt
Me too as i heard over the radio, the sexual harrasment was mentioned. I guess thats the closest they could get to tarnish the scandal-free PR statemen. As a woman, i am embarrassed for their words and actions...