Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I Won't Tell Anybody... I Don't Need A Parachute...

Mak always reminds me that once I become someone’s wife (Amin 44x), I should never never never ever wash my dirty laundry in public and not even to my parents.

“Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them” ~ Bill Maher

Mak also advises me that whenever I am in great angst, I should take ablution and speak to God because Anger is one letter short of danger.

“Be to her virtues very kind, Be to her faults a little blind” ~ Matthew Prior

Mak says I should hold my tongue, my hands and my thoughts a little longer to calm down my emotions. If I have children in tow, I should never never ever show my skill of throwing-tantrum with my spouse (touch wood). A woman is a human but God has created her so strong, for her to sort things out and be “a woman [who] should soften but not weaken a man (Sigmund Freud)”.

Mak lets me know that marriage isn’t about power grabbing, attention seeking, winning or making a woman a weakling. It should make one as good as one could be but a bad marriage can make one as bad as one dares to be (Elbert Hubbard).

If I needed to cry, Mak tells, cry as hard as I can but "Stop all shame, blame, and criticism. Instead ask for what you want in a clear, specific, and positive manner, and express appreciation for your partner. To elaborate: Men need to feel competent—that they make a contribution and that it is noticed. They like to be told what 'behavior' makes you happy. Since men tend to express affection by doing things, you should interpret their actions as love. When men know what to do and are acknowledged for it, they tend to keep doing it (Harville Hendrix, PhD, author of Getting the Love You Want)”.

p.s. At first, I wanted to politicise Cheryl Cole's "Parachute" but lately, the lyrics carry different feeling... Perhaps, you could read between the lines and draw similarities to what I wrote in this post...

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